When Writing Doesn’t Happen

When writing doesn’t happen, because life is happening and you can’t stop to write . . . it’s okay.

When writing doesn’t happen, because the worlds are alive in your head but they won’t go on the page yet . . . it’s okay.

When writing doesn’t happen, even though we’re halfway into the first month of that year you were really going to start working toward those writing dreams . . . it’s okay.

When writing a blog post hasn’t happened, because it’s late and your brain doesn’t function and your week has been too busy to allow time for writing a post . . . it’s okay.

It’s okay
because plans go amiss
and life goes awry
and all those dreams don’t always work out
but sometimes they work out better than you planned
because off the beaten path
and off the line on the map you’ve drawn
may be better than anything
you could have wished for.

It’s okay
because if the worlds are alive in your head
there’s no need to fear (like you are secretly fearing)
that they will never be caught on the page again
because that will only happen if you are afraid.
But there’s no need to fear.
Remember?

It’s okay
because two weeks is not make-it-or-break-it
especially when life is busy
and not having started toward that dream
doesn’t mean you’ve failed.

It’s okay
because if you don’t post on your blog one week
nobody will notice or care or be upset at you
and the world will not end.

When writing doesn’t happen . . .

. . . it’s okay.

I promise.

Because you can always try again.

Because the negative space of “I haven’t…” is not stronger than the positive space of “I have.”

And between the two is “I will” — a dream, and a promise, and a hope for the future.

So we’ll write when we can. And when we can’t . . . it’s okay.

When the busy week is up, or when the worlds are bursting to come forth onto the page, or when the new year calms down and you stop worrying about how much you’re getting done (or not getting done), or when the blog inspiration is there . . . then you will write.

The words will be there. Later. When they’re ready.

These are things I’m trying to learn, so I thought I would share them, in case they help you too.

Sometimes you need to try. But other times . . . you need to let the road surprise you, and relax on the journey.

Sometimes you find Narnia when you’re not looking for it.

And sometimes, just sometimes, when you’re not trying . . . is when you succeed.

And oh, look, I have a blog post after all. ๐Ÿ™‚

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New Year, New Dreams

Oh, look, 2017 is over. Imagine that.

I now greet you from the amazing FUTURISTIC YEAR 2018. (Seriously though, who gave that number permission? I swear it’s still 2013…)

I’ll get to some quick writerly highlights of 2017 in a minute, but first…

Now is about the correct time to list goals and resolutions for the year.

But they’re funny things, goals.

They are things to mark off, and every moment spent NOT marking them off (other than moments spent actively working toward them, of course) can be seen as a failure… (Or is that just me? *cough*)

Which means that most of the time, goals can leave a person deciding to throw in the towel and move to the Alps to live with the goats instead.

(And don’t get me started on Resolutions, because those can be even worse. The second you break one: NOPE, DONE.)

Dreams, though… Dreams are different.

Dreams, you’re allowed to — well — dream them. And yes, you work toward them if/when you can, but they’re something more elusive; maybe they happen and maybe they don’t; maybe they’re out of your control but you can hope anyway; and maybe, just maybe, one day they’ll come true… especially if you work on them.

Dreams are less guilt-oriented and less of a rigid To Do List You Must Mark Off Or Else You Are Not A Decent Human And It’s Alps And Goats For You. (Don’t ask about the analogy, just… yeah, just roll with it.)

That’s why, here at the start of 2018, instead of resolutions or goals, I’m going to share some of my writerly dreams.

2018 Writer Dreams

  • Finish another novel. Not particularly picky as to which one, though The Siren and the Skyship would be my first choice at the moment.
  • Finish the short stories I started. (The Treasure of A Distant Storm, The Tangled Thicket of Perilous Perrifeld, Hairdo Havoc.)
  • Stop getting hung up on perfection and not-starting and just WRITE A LOT.
  • Which also means not getting distracted or letting other things get in the way of actually letting myself have some writing time. (This is harder than you might think.)
  • Start a newsletter. (Is this a terrible or awesome idea? Please advise!)
  • Start Instagramming. (I actually have one, I just… can’t post there yet because you need a smartphone to do so. *cough*)
  • Start a Facebook page. (Shocking, I know…)
  • Set up my official website. Which I’ve only been meaning to do forever. (Don’t worry, this blog and my book blog aren’t going anywhere! I’d just like a central hub, is all. Because #professional. And because — let’s be honest — MORE PRETTY WEBSITES!)
  • Get a crystal fox from The Last Jedi for a pet. (Wait, what? How did THAT show up on my writing dream list? O_O Ahem. Moving on…)
  • Spend more time with the stories and characters I love most. Like Tare and co., The Other Half of Everything, and The Siren and the Skyship. Speaking of which…

  • Develop the sequels to The Siren and the Skyship. (Yes, it’s a trilogy now. Yes, I know I haven’t finished the first one. Yes, there are more fairytales, though I’m not 100% as to which. Yes, I’m insane. Shush.)
  • Get my freelance proofreading/copyediting business off the ground. (This is the part where I get annoying and actually *gasp* market my services, and say: “Does anyone need a book edited? I love catching typos! I’m good at it, too!” But I’ll skip that part, because it’s boring. XD Oh, wait…)
  • Be more open about my writing dreams and thoughts on my blog. Wait, what? Isn’t that what this post is about? Well, yes. I’m not saying I’mย not open and honest on this blog, because I am. But I’m somewhat of a shy, introspective person, and I was realizing I don’t actually share about things that really MATTER to me and are important to me, like my deeper struggles about publishing and writing and all of those goals and things. Would anyone care, I wonder? Is it only me? Sometimes I don’t share my writing goals because I’m afraid of failing; because, somehow, I expect to fail — and I need to stop that. So being more open with you, my lovely readers, might be a step in a better direction. Tare and I need to realize we need our Chess Club. (That’s you.) And as much as he and I like to work alone… “it’s more friendly with two.” ๐Ÿ™‚
  • Figure out what on earth I plan to do about publishing, because I’m dreadfully confused and have been for years now. I think I’m pinning down some of what’s going on with my struggle, but it hasn’t shown the answer yet. I should probably post about this…
  • Speaking of: Write more awesome blog posts. And have a giveaway or two, because those are fun. And basically continue (hopefully) epicness and keep all involved happy. (Everyone: me, you, and the pixel-fairies who carry the words between us across the tangled web of internet. No idea where that came from. It must be getting late, y’all.)
  • Gather all the info I’ve accumulated over the years about publishing and marketing and make a sort of list of said tips. Because I feel like I know and have learned SO MANY THINGS, and would kind of like to see how much there is.
  • Get closer to publishing something, somehow.
  • (And… while I’m dreaming — hey, why not a really big one that I have no idea if it’s even feasible?) I would love to be able to go to Realm Makers this year. ๐Ÿ˜‰ No idea if it could even happen, but it would be nice!

(My inner editor is squirming about that missing comma before “darling.” Unfortunately, my editing does not extend to gifs… Also, yes, I went from Tangled to Inception; problem? I have wide tastes. XD)

2017 Writing Highlights

  • Wrote a total of 86,000 words.
  • Wrote 5 short stories (Wintertale, A Tale of Two Boxes, a Kedran’s Wood “fanfiction” for myself and Lauri, Invisible Beauty, and Tare and the Puppies) — 3 of which I shared online! *shocking*
  • Started two other short stories (The Treasure of A Distant Storm, and The Tangled Thicket of Perilous Perrifeld. Wow, their titles are almost short stories in themselves…)
  • I hardly ever write short stories, so working on 7 this year has been very interesting.

  • Some work on Kedran’s Wood 2 (which is getting long and rambly and unwieldy; I should do something about that).
  • Also dibs and dabs of The Other Half of Everything, which is at around 15K words, despite not having a complete chapter written. XD (Writing things out of order and only when you’re 110% inspired is fascinating. If I ever get it done, it’s going to be the most awesome book ever, is all I’m saying.)

  • Started The Siren and the Skyship (and got maybe halfway).
  • So many plot ideas and lightbulb inspiration moments and restructuring of various books and series. There’s a lot going on in the fictional worlds inside my head, lately! I’M SO EXCITED.
  • Met with many amazing writer friends throughout the year. It’s been incredible! โค
  • Participated in my 8th NaNoWriMo (as well as two Camp NaNo sessions, even though I didn’t plan on either. XD) and won.
  • Was an ML for my NaNo region for the 5th time, and ran a writing group sometimes.

  • Was in print for the first time! (Okay, not really… I was in a print copy of the collected Tales from a Modern Bard stories from that blog, which just the authors got copies of. But I did get to hold in my hands something with a story of mine printed in it! Thanks to Hazel!)
  • Got my first fan-art from the lovely Skye! (Thank you! โค )
  • Did lots of beta-reading and editing and such.
  • Built the Vintage Jane Austen website — such a joy to work with these talented authors! It’s been beautiful seeing this series release into the world this last year!
  • Was part of the second annual SilmAwards!
  • Announced my freelancing services.
  • Wrote more or less 50,000 words of book reviews this year. (Er… yeah… I write them in Scrivener and it tells me I’m pretty close to that, and I know I wrote some I didn’t put in there, so… yeah, more or less. Plus other blog posts, so who KNOWS how much of that there’s been. No wonder I don’t write as much fiction as I used to! O_O It’s been fun, though!)
  • Started a bullet journal. (Not super writerly, but it does keep me vaguely organized. I’m so excited to be starting a new one for the New Year today! The blue journal pictured in the header image of this post.)
  • Wrote in my writer’s journal every week this year. (Wow! o.o)
  • Posted 50 posts here on The Road of a Writer, and 66 posts on The Page Dreamer.
  • I’m positive I’m missing something EXTREMELY important, but this will have to do. XD

I’ll be sharing my top 15 favorite books I read in 2017, on my book blog soon, so watch out for that!

So, there you have my 2017 and a look forward to this new (futuristic *coughcough*) year of 2018!

And as I type this on New Year’s Eve, there’s snow on the ground outside, which is practically unheard of around here…

So you see, dreams do come true.

***

Happy New Year, my beloved Roadlings! May you have a most glorious and fantastic one indeed! โค

How was your 2017 and what are some of your dreams for this year?

My Year in Writing {2016}

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2017.

A new year.

2017 always sounded like one of those far-away numbers, you know? Just fancy it being here now!

Time, my roadlings. Time is mysterious.

This last year of 2016 was in many ways a tough year for me, but filled with good things too. ๐Ÿ™‚

If you’d like to see my Top 12 Books I Read in 2016 and other miscellaneous info about my reading life this last year, you can check out my post on my book blog! You know, in case you’re curious. ๐Ÿ˜‰

This post, however, is all about my year of writing! (I know, I know, you would never have guessed from the title…)

2016 Writing

I wrote 71,854 words in 2016. Which… is less than my usual 100K, but I will be thankful for it. ๐Ÿ˜‰

Since 51K of that was NaNo, my non-NaNo writing amounted to 20,720 words… which is why I feel like it was a slow year. Most months I was writing 2K in a month, which… well, let’s just say I won’t get my enormous 100K+ monster books written in a hurry at this rate. But all the same, I’m very pleased with the writing I DID get done, and I think I needed a slower, casual year of writing anyway. We’ll just go with that.

WRITING THAT I DID…

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I started The Library in the Stars and wrote 51,000 words of that — huzzah! (Now I just need to write the ending. *cough*)

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I “officially” started The Other Half of Everything, wrote part of the first chapter, and proceeded to keep writing it out of order later on in the book in snippets. Oops? 6,000 words this year.

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Filled in holes in The Secret of Kedran’s Wood and did editing on a few chapters and officially finished the first draft of Part 1! *celebration* I also started the next chapter, wrote a bit of that… and proceeded to keep writing it out of order later on in the book in snippets. Oops? (Wait, did I just say that earlier? *cough* Apparently it’s a trend.)

I wrote 6,800 words of KW2 this year.

On that note, I’m convinced Tare ambushed me and made me write an extra thousand words post-NaNo solely to be able to show Teague that KW is still ahead of OHE in the word department this year. Nicely played, Tare.

And we will NOT talk about the fact that I’m over 63,000 words into it and only a third done the story. AHEM.

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And I wrote over 3,000 words of The Invisible Mask, and hit 20K, which was very exciting! I consider the “opening” done, so I’m kind of thrilled about this.

MidnightFearIMG

Rewrote an old short story, Midnight Fear, which used to be just over 1,000 words, and now is just under that. Very pleased with the rewrite.

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I also wrote that Silmarillion Awards Strangest Character presentation post poem, featuring Tom Bombadil and Puddleglum, which was 800 words.

Other than that, I wrote another 1000-ish words on random things like my New Year’s poem, short story Hairdo Havoc, The Silver Forest, and other Kedran’s Wood series jots, including Book 4… even though I’m still on Book 2. Yeah, don’t ask. #TareAndChessClubProblems

PLOTTING THAT I DID…

I did various plotting on various books, including The Silver Forest and The Invisible Mask, but mostly for The Other Half of Everything and the Kedran’s Wood series (mostly KW2), and for The Library in the Stars.

The biggest news was The Library in the Stars exploding into being, out of a bunch of different previous ideas, and being plotted and started.

I also had some exciting “clicking” moments for Once Upon a November, The Siren and the Skyship, and my short story Hairdo Havoc.

And new ideas happened too, of course. My Fairy Godmother Muse has been quite busy.

I suppose I should be grateful I only have half a dozen new “official” ones, if I include The Library in the Stars? (Which did actually combine some ideas, so maybe I’m at about the same number? I don’t know, my Fairy Godmother Muse confuses me so much these days.)

  • Painting Rainbows (Underground Rainbow spinoff involving heists & the painter artist Kevin Johnson)
  • From That Shadowy Land (inspired by various ballads and featuring Faeries)
  • The Treasure of A Distant Storm (futuristic London short story)
  • Wintertale (I don’t even know. Thankfully, it’s a short story)
  • (And an untitled novel to be written sometime farrr in the future, involving fantasy tropes)

#FairyGodmotherMuseProblems #PlotBunnyProblems

OTHER RANDOM WRITING FACTS…

  • Best writing day: 7,589 words (Nov 27.)
  • Completed my 7th NaNo!
  • Was an ML on my own for the first time
  • Was interviewed!
  • Got Scrivener (a.k.a. the Preciousss <3)
  • Started a book review blog and managed to write 61 posts on that during the year!
  • Additionally*, I wrote 76 posts on this blog
  • Yes, that is 137 posts total this last year
  • Somebody save me from myself

*I typed that as “addictionally” the first time. Oh the irony.


And that’s about it! Overall, not a bad year (Fairy Godmother Muse and her antics notwithstanding). ^_^

I don’t know what this new year of 2017 will hold for me in the writing arena (and I’m avoiding making plans, since historically plans and I do not mix well together — they tend to laugh at me, attack, knock me out, steal my everything, and leave me looking very foolish) but I’m looking forward to finding out! ๐Ÿ™‚

How was your year of writing in 2016? Do you have problems with a Fairy Godmother Muse of your own? Any exciting writerly pursuits in the last year? Tell me all!

P.S. Iโ€™m thinking of going on a blog/internet break for two or three weeks… so I may disappear for a bit and come back around the end of January, give or take. Just a heads-up. Have a great month, everyone! โค

i can’t see where the road goes

roadpoemnewyear

I can’t see where the road goes
As through the trees it turns
Though deep inside my heart I feel
A world of wishes burns

But still I follow after
The path my feet must take
Where what awaits is surely more
Than words or wishes make

So show me where the road goes
Or teach me: know I must
Beyond horizons veiled, things are
Awaiting me through trust

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Looking Forward, Looking Back (2016/2015)

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I love the change of the year and have been doing many of my favorite New Years things like starting new journals. A fresh year is waiting, like a blank page to be written on, and the old year is gone, with all its good times and, yes, failures. It’s time to start fresh.

Danny Gokey says it beautifully in his song Tell Your Heart to Beat Again: “Yesterday’s a closing door — you don’t live there anymore.” Give the song a listen! (I heard it on the radio this week, fell in love, and have listened to it ten billion times since and am listening to it on repeat as I write this post). It’s beautiful and feels just right for the New Year.

Here are some of my excitements for the new year of 2016, as well as a brief look back at my 2015. And — yes! — lists!

2016

My word for 2016

Joy is my word this year. I want to find joy in everything if I can. It’s going to be hard, since I struggle with a tendency to be stressed and down on myself. But I’m tired of feeling crushed beneath expectations, beneath things I feel are obligations which ought to be enjoyable but have become chores. This includes — yes — writing, reading, emailing… even the things that I usually love, sometimes can become a burden because I’m a chronic procrastinator and a perfectionist. I’m hoping to approach everything, the fun and the not, with Joy. To rediscover my Joy in writing and life and find a freedom I’ve been looking for . . . that is my wish for the new year.

JOY! ๐Ÿ™‚

I’M EXCITED FOR THIS YEAR:

aspysdevotionThese books coming out:

Yorien’s Hand // The Goblin’s Puzzle // A Spy’s Devotion // Fridays with the Wizards // Rebel of the Sands // Songkeeper // The Story of Kullervo // King’s Folly // The Beautiful Pretender // Five Magic Spindles // Defying Shadows // Stolen Crowns #1 // The Bone Queen // Crooked Kingdom

(I did a post about this if you want pics/links to Goodreads, but I’ve since added Songkeeper by Gillian Bronte Adams — sequel to Orphan’s Song — and Crooked Kingdom by Leigh Bardugo, both of which are sequels that I need this instant. *flail*)

These movies releasing:

  • The Abominable Bride (Sherlock special which I’m hopefully going to see on Wednesday… YAY!)
  • Captain America: The Civil War (YESSSS!! As I may have mentioned, I’m kind of looking forward to this a lot, primarily because BUCKY and HAWKEYE!)
  • Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (Because Star Wars…)

(Also, perhaps someday I’ll see Kung Fu Panda 3, Alice Through the Looking Glass, and Batman Vs. Superman, which are releasing this year, but I’m not in a super hurry as they also sound weird…)

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I’d also like to see:

  • Pan (missed that when it came out last year)
  • The Guardians of the Galaxy (somehow still haven’t seen this)
  • Thor 2: The Dark World (which I technically saw once but need to rewatch since I have no memory of it which is slightly terrifying since I think I liked it a lot?!)

My 2015 at a Glance

READING

66 Books

2015books

I read many lovely books, notably many retellings and much Diana Wynne Jones; and discovered steampunk and heist books. (Yay!) And I just posted my top 15 favorites of the year.

Goodreads has a lovely new “Year in Books Feature” which I love! (Mine is here.)

WATCHING

Shows I saw:

  • Leverage (seasons 1-5) — everyone knows how much I love this… *cough*
  • Jonathan Strange & Mr. Norrell (BBC Miniseries) — interesting to see on screen
  • Star Wars: Rebels (Season 1) — I ADORED THIS! Sooo much fun. โค

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I don’t go to the theater often, but this year I saw:

  • starwars7posterStar Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens — AS;LDKJFLSK FEELS. WHAT. Still haven’t decided what I think of it except that I know I had a blast and then felt extremely sad near the end… I think overall I loved it? But I’m not sure yet! *flail* One thing’s for sure: ALL OF THE FEELS. And I adore the new characters, particularly Poe, and want to see the movie again.
  • Cinderella — Gorgeous.
  • Avengers: Age of Ultron — Hawkeye!!
  • Mockingjay Part 2 — Um.
  • Beyond the Mask — EPIC!!! โค

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BLOGGING

87 Posts

I really discovered my love of blogging this last year, and started my Ishness posts, and just had a fun time.

My top viewed posts were:

ccakeFrom which I discern that people are unprepared for NaNo (always), and love movies (or characters), bookshelves, Christmas, and cupcakes (or possibly denial). Basically you, my blog readers, have your priorities in order. *thumbs up*

WordPress has a handy blog report showcase for the year which is fun. Take a look at my blog stats if you enjoy numbers like I do. XD

It says my top commenters were Sarah, Tracey, Christine, C.B., and Abi — thank you guys! And to every single person who reads this blog and who has commented (even just once) a heartfelt thank you. โค You make my day every time. ^_^

WRITING

Over 100,000 Words

DRcoverishR&RI wrote an entire novella and two whole short stories (and a couple fanfictions) — namely:

KW2coverPSilverForestCoverFinalAnd worked on several other books:

  • 2. The Secret of Kedran’s Wood (mostly this one)
  • The Silver Forest (and this one)
  • 0.5. Child of Kedran’s Wood
  • 2.5 Mixup at Kedran’s Wood
  • 3 The Shadow of Kedran’s Wood
  • 4 The Writer of Kedran’s Wood
  • Heartseeker
  • The Other Half of Everything (snippets)

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OHEcoverI was attacked by several new plotbunnies that I adore and can’t wait to write, most notably:

  • The Other Half of Everything
  • The Siren and the Skyship

My Kedran’s Wood series exploded into several different books/novellas/short stories.

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My epic fantasy series the Starrellian Saga is taking shape in a new and exciting way as I reimagine all of the threads into a different sort of book structure.

A few other exciting things:

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***

PonyFrom the start of the year when I was followed by a pony from the post office, through seeing my first stage play, spontaneously going on a few roadtrips, being a NaNo Municipal Liaison for the third time, all the way to spending my last days of the year frantically editing a novella under a deadline for the first time . . . it’s been a very interesting year!

With my new word (Joy) in hand, I look forward to what 2016 holds!

I haven’t made specific writing/reading goals yet. I’m on a semi-hiatus from writing for a bit, so we’ll see what happens after that… I’m currently leaving my options open. ๐Ÿ™‚

How was your 2015? I wish you all a truly fantastic 2016!